He was born on a Monday,
The cleanest of births,
In a secret facility,
Way down in the earth.

He grew up so quickly,
His mother would say,
All gentle and loving,
His father would say.

Clean hanky in pocket,
Swiss knife in his boot,
Books under his arm,
Clean jocks in his pack.

Everything he needed,
But still not quite enough,
When the facility come tumbling down,
To save the ones he loved.

So off he went to see the world,
This young man and his pack,
Though the world is a big and scary place,
He never would turn back.

He joined the foreign legion,
Still haunted by his past,
A seven year old child,
With a goal to do whats right.

Fourteen years flew on by,
The boy is now a man,
Determined to have what he needs,
Within the reach of his hand.

No longer would a person,
Have disaster strike them down,
For now there was a hope out there,
Convenience came to town.

From a child without ice cream,
To an awakening volcano,
There was no issue so inconvenient,
It could not be overcome.

Years ago he was unprepared,
Nothing but a child,
Now he is a grown man,
A hero with a smile.

Newspapers spin with headlines,
Of a caped crusader,
Always saving special days,
From evil chance and foulest natures.

A hero with a backpack,
Never showing lenience,
He'll defend us till the end of time,
He's Captain of Convenience.

Convenience Man!